Showing posts with label man bashing monday. Show all posts
Showing posts with label man bashing monday. Show all posts

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Man vs Woman - Battle of the Sexes

I was Stumbling over the weekend while sipping my morning cup of coffee when I came across this article in Cosmopolitan about 21 Things Women Do Better Than Men. Good grief, as a woman I know I am better than a man!
Anyway, the whole thing was sparked by an article in AskMen about 10 Things Only Men Can Do. This whole good natured ribbing has inspired me to ponder the differences between men and women. I haven't too much time to dwell on it as I have children to care for,  mouths to feed, floors to wash, laundry to fold...well you get the picture, but here is my list.

10 Things I know I Do Better Than Men (yes you hubby)

  • 1. Express our feelings. We are not afraid to cry, scream, stomp our feet if we want to be heard. As a woman I pride myself for being able to express my feelings (even if I seem childish or stark raving mad)
  • 2. I can wear makeup and not look like a cross dresser. I can do up my hair, don my fanciest dress, wear high heals and perfume...and not offend anybody (unless my idea of dressing up resembles that of a street walkers attire)
  • 3. Bodily fluids. That should need not much explanation, but here goes. As a woman and a mother, I can wade knee deep in puke, shit, snot, blood, rotting food, garbage pails all for the sake of my family. My husband gets sick if he has to change a poopy diaper, smells vomit and nearly faints at the sight of blood. We have a thick skin and high tolerance when it comes to bodily fluids and gross stuff.
  • 4. I can go to the grocery store and buy what is on the list. Nothing less, nothing more. My husband will miss half of the crucial items and come home with chips, pop and an endless array of unwanted garbage.
  • 5. Women can drink fruity drinks decorated with umbrellas and fruit without seeming less womanly. If a man orders a drink like that you can bet that the other chaps in the bar are laughing at him and speculating his sexuality.
  • 6. PMS. While it is no picnic for the woman (or those closest to her), we can use our raging hormones as an excuse for bad behavior! If a man acts out by way of temper tantrums, crying and binge eating, people worry or think he is a big asshole!
  • 7. Clean the house. When a woman cleans the home, she dusts everything, moves furniture, uses harsh chemicals, changes bed linens...the list goes on and on for day (maybe that is why I hate housework). When a man cleans house (yes hubby that is you) he puts away his socks, uses the clean tea towel for drying dishes to wipe down a greasy filthy counter, uses a dirty toilet brush on a dirty toilet without cleaning solution...eeewwww.
  • 8. Bathe the children. My husband, rarely bathes the kids. But when he does, hair goes unwashed and my daughters privates are never looked at. There could be mushrooms growing down there and he wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole.
  • 9. Multitask. While my husband does have a job that requires him to multitask, the minute he gets home his ability to do so disappears along with his ability to get himself a drink of water. As a mom I can have several things going on at the same time. I can have 3 meals cooking (I often do this...but that is a topic for another blog entry), talk on the phone with my mother, have laundry going, sweep the kitchen floor and check emails. 
  • 10. Illness. When a woman is sick she has to buck up and deal with it, especially us mom's. If a mother is ill she still has to care for her family, as difficult as it may be. She will drag her but out of bed, aches, coughing, weezing, boogers and all, just to make sure that her son  has his snack for school and a spare change of clothes in case the get wet at recess. My husband would give the kid a stick of gum and wish him a great day. A Canadian study showed that women possess a sex hormone called estrogen that gives female immune systems an added edge when it comes to resisting infections. When a man gets sick, he acts and believes that he is on death's doorstep. The simple task of wiping ones own nose becomes as difficult as climbing Mt.Everest! This is likely the only time a woman will see a man cry.

What can you think of that woman can do better than men?

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Great Quotes by Great Women


If you are like me, you often find yourself arguing with your husband, father, brother or son....usually some man who thinks is convinced he knows everything! Men say that we women are terrible to argue with but we know better, don't we girls?! Anyway, on those occasions when I just can't think of anything good as a comeback, or 'gasp' I am losing the argument, I often wish I could come up with some really good quotes to prove my point that men are 'meehhh' and women are superior! So from here now on every Monday at the Mamma Goddess is Man Bashing Monday!! 


I did some searching and found these quotes by famous women.

You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy. -- Erica Jong 


My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. -- Rita Rudner

I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb... and I also know that I'm not blonde. -- Dolly Parton

I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. -- Wendy Liebman

Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth to. -- Erma Bombeck

If high heels were so wonderful, men would be wearing them. -- Sue Grafton

I would love to speak a foreign language, but I can't. So I grew hair under my arms instead. -- Sue Kolinsky

I think -- therefore I'm single. -- Lizz Winstead

"When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country." -- Elayne Boosler

"I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch." -- Gilda Radner

"Behind every successful man is a surprised woman." -- Maryon Pearson

"Our struggle today is not to have a female Einstein get appointed as an assistant professor. It is for a woman schlemiel to get as quickly promoted as a male schlemiel." --- Bella Abzug

"In politics, If you want anything said, ask a man; If you want anything done, ask a woman." -- Margaret Thatcher

"I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career." -- Gloria Steinem

"Nagging is the repetition of unpalatable truths." -- Baroness Edith Summerskill

"If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck?" -- Linda Ellerbee

"Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry." -- Gloria Steinem

Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then." -- Katharine Hepburn